Healing, Takes Its Sweet Time

Walking into the sunlight after being indoors there is a moment of recovery. The same is true entering a darkened room from a bright and sunny outside. The eyes take time to adapt to the new environment. This is an easy sign there has been a change. One is perfectly aware of the new situation, for you have chosen to leave or enter the comfort you're used to and switch your conditions. Although in the advent of a sudden traumatic life threatening event, one may not be aware of the changes one might experience after this change.
I am talking about my truck accident and head injury. When I became conscious I was told about my shoulder replacement. This did take some getting use to but it was sure obvious with the huge incision and the fact that I had trouble using this arm. Over time and with physical therapy I got some movement back and can how do most things with my left arm, although I am still rebuilding the strength. The brain damage is not so easy to identify. While one is suffering from a severe blow to the head, it is not clear that there is a problem. For example; I had double vision when I came to. My eyesight did not seem odd. That is just the way it was, I had to be told of my double vision for me to be aware of it, and that it is not normal. Each eye was seeing things at a different angle. Horizontal line were the main problem, i.e. door frames, pictures on a wall, bigger buildings with obvious floor differential, drove me nuts. I was given an eye patch that helped but I did not like wearing it. Once I was asked at a store by a little girl if I was a pirate ( I have never seen a pirate before she said). I preferred to simply close one eye. This I thought looked better.
I also was not aware of the fact that my thought processes had been altered. I was told in a polite way that I sounded like a child, and when I would see people from time to time someone would inevitably say you sound much better then the last time I saw you. They would mean well but I never took it well. "What are you saying? what do you mean?" For I could not see any difference. I was told that I am not aware of the brain changes as I insisted that I am fine, and to leave me alone.
Slowly I was becoming in-tune with what people were talking about. I started to notice things that had changed. The eyesight fixed itself by looking at the horizontal images and forcing the eyes to blend, and it worked. I started noticing that I could not recognize words at first glance. I could tell the words were composites of letters to form words but I could not read them without working them out. In essence I had to learn to read all over again. I remembered that before the accident I could just look at words and recognized them without much thought. Now they were not so clear. There was something wrong with my head, and it would take even more time to recover, or this was my hope. I now know what brain damage looks like, for I am living it. A friend said that I seem to be somehow kinder, softer, I am not sure exactly what that means, but now I am questioning my perception of myself. How will I know when I am back, since I was unaware of it in the first place? What does normal look like?